You see couples around you, madly in love and still keeping that spark alive. Even after being together for months or years, they feel the butterflies. Well, like everything, relationships do have their pros and cons. We, as humans, are a sucker for love, attention and attachment but sure we forget the downside of being in a relationship.
While being in a relationship, there will be times where you start questioning the worth, the purpose of your relationship and ask yourself the questions; Is this really it? Is this the peak of our relationship? Is my life always going to be like this? What if I want more, what if everything was different would I still feel this way? What if I am with a wrong person and I really cannot do anything about it? What if my life could have been better if I would have stuck with my Ex?
These are just mere examples of what your mind can put you through to question the very relevance of your relationship and make you perceive that you’re not truly happy and you’re not quite satisfied.
Things only get more confusing, frustrating, uninteresting and distasteful from here on out and you feel as if you need to run away from all of this, your partner your house, and get your identity back and somehow start over.
But before you do that give this article a read, and then decide.
Bitter Realities of Relationships That Everyone Faces but No One Tells
Don’t feel the same now
Do you feel empty inside? Like you don’t know when it happened, but you don’t feel in the same way for your partner now. You’re in a state of indifference; the internal rush of an uncontrollable passion you felt when they touched you when you looked in their eyes and felt a warmth of compassion, and how you thought about them all day has all lost its meaning to you and it doesn’t matter to you anymore.
If all of this is happening, then don’t be surprised, we sometimes do go through such a phase in our relationship. It’s really okay and normal to feel this way and no need to go on guilty trips. Just don’t make any hasty decisions and talk about it with your close friends or family. Try looking for reasons and ways to restore the lost love and charm in your relationship.
You’ll learn that love is overrated
We all believe and weave our fairy tales when we are young. Yes, we all have done that and as we grow up, face the realities of life, we all understand and accept that love is highly overrated. What actually keeps the relationships going is sacrifice, compassion, respect, trust and then love. Love is said and believed to be the vital ingredient in any relationship, but it surely is over-hyped.
If love goes away for some time, then that’s completely okay. Emotions often change, and no emotion can overstay its course; you can’t be angry or happy or sad all the time, and with love, it works much the same way; you can’t be in love all the time. However, I am not saying that the feeling of love has permanently vanished, let’s say it’s just on a vacation. It may be back if you really believe in the bond of your relationship.
He/She doesn’t understand you anymore
So when the relationship is new and your partner is making all the efforts to understand you, you may feel that now everything will automatically fall into place, right?
Well no, it won’t.
To your disappointment, the equation of relationships doesn’t work this way. Your partner won’t always be receptive to what really goes on inside your mind, they won’t always be able to grasp you as a person and you’ll feel misunderstood at times like they do not really know you and probably never will.
To have a realistic relationship, you need to get rid of this unrealistic illusion of your partner delving into the very fibres of your soul and knowing all the bits and pieces that make you who you are; they’ll figure you out to a great extent but don’t really expect them to know and understand every bit of your soul. You may keep trying though and with a lot of efforts to nurture your relationship, it may happen someday. Keep the hopes alive!
Love breaks you more than it makes you
When you command the guards of your heart to rest and bare your soul to your partner, know that you are also gifting them with a sword to kill you and hit you on the spot where it’ll hurt the most. But, then that’s how the relationships work, right? As you put the walls down, you will expose yourself to a lot of hurts; you’ll get your heart broken countless times, you’ll get damaged and shattered many times, and time and time again you’ll recover from the pain.
The wear and tear of your heart and soul will be the most difficult part of your relationship. But learn to be forgiving, understanding when it comes to your partner it’s only human to make mistakes. Once both of you get through this, you’ll only come out stronger.
A relationship may cost you your Family and Friends
You must be thinking am I out of my mind or what? Why would you lose your valuable relations for your relationship? But yes, this is one of the bitter reality of relationships, the ones you held so dear and close to your heart once will entirely diminish into the background, and the love you’ve shared with your closest of friends will only remain in the form of unbreakable bonds as your priorities change once you get married and inevitably life takes a different path for you and everyone.
The focus of your life will change and you may soon find everything revolving around one person, though in your heart and mind, all your friends and family may stay and cross on daily basis but considering the priorities, they will remain out of focus somehow and you will also feel okay and accepting about it.
Relationships, where both the partners respect and manage time for every other relationship, are the best. The balance is the key!