Yes, you read it right! If you’re among those who want to stay longer in bed but couldn’t able to control your ejaculation, you’re on the right page! You often read a lot about doing some exercise or following a proper diet etc to last longer in bed. Reading such articles is all good but the major problem here is that the people who write about the premature ejaculation or not being able to stay longer in bed have never been in such a situation. Yes, that’s right! Most people who write blogs on this condition share the data they researched on the internet in a couple of minutes or hours. Contrary to that, if you’re suffering from premature ejaculation, you would like to hear the story and experience of someone who has faced it and has overcome the same, right? Hence, I’m here to share my story with you and provide with some tips to last longer in bed from my own experience. So, let’s get started!
“When I was in my mid-20s, I was in a relationship with this beautiful girl of the same age. After spending a good amount of time together, we decided to take our relationship one step ahead. But as you know, in India, it isn’t easy to get a proper environment to share such beautiful moments with your partner. During the time when we were seeking such an atmosphere where we can make whoopee, we were quite excited and discussed it all tons of times already. And, the day we were dreaming of had finally come! We both were all prepared to give it a shot. I was too excited to have this moment that when it actually happened, I blew my load on her pillow right in the middle of the foreplay. You can imagine how embarrassing that would have been for me. I lost my shot and that haunted me for months like a terrible nightmare, followed by the awkward silences whenever we talk about giving it another shot!”
Though I knew that wasn’t the solution to this embarrassment and I had to work on it soon. Just like you, I read tons of articles and followed many tips and tricks to last longer in bed. And finally, I figured out what worked for me and that will definitely work for you as well. So, pick up your notebook and get ready to pen down some instructions to follow:
Stop Overthinking About How You’re Going to Perform!
Well, yes! You gotta stop overthinking about your performance in bed and be confident about it. Imagining the sexual activities with your partner is all good, however, being worried about lasting longer in bed won’t help but cause you the sexual anxiety. Yes, you must have read about it a lot on the internet, right? Well, if you’re wondering whether that’s actually the reason for not lasting longer in bed, let me tell you, sir, it is one solid reason! Let’s understand the whole process with the help of an example!
Being naked, even in a room where no one is around, is a kind of insecure feeling – unless you’re a porn star or working for a Playboy magazine, right? When you’re naked, this insecurity turns into the anxiety and the cells in your body send a message to your brain that this environment isn’t safe for you. Now your body does everything to let you escape from this insecure moment, which in this case is either premature ejaculation or erectile dysfunction (ED).
So, how to perform better in bed and control your ejaculation for a longer period of time? The answer is being confident and open about your performance. You may even talk to your partner as she’s the one who might be more conscious about your sex life than you. Remember, there’s nothing to be ashamed of! Almost 80% of men experience the same shit but don’t discuss it with anyone – though their insecurities compel them to search the ways to last longer in bed.
Focus on Some Kegels Exercises!
Kegels exercises are very helpful to strengthen your pelvic muscles, which are used while we ejaculate. If you aren’t sure about your pelvic muscle, I’ll help you find them! Go to the washroom and start peeing, no I’m not kidding. Stop and start urinating in middle a couple of times and focus on the muscles you used. Yes, you can imagine stopping urinating while reading this article as well – if you’re a lazy ass like me! Once you find that muscle, all you need to do is the Kegel exercises to strengthen pelvic floor muscles. These are the muscles that not only control the flow of urine but also your ejaculation as well.
How To Do Kegel or Pelvic Floor Exercise for Men?
What you need to do is lie down on the floor or bed – whatever is suitable – and pull your abdomen area in the air. Make sure that your bums, abdomen and thigh muscles don’t touch the floor and your body is resting on your back and the sole of your feet. When in this position, hold your pelvic muscles for five seconds. Relax for a couple of seconds and then repeat it for a few more times. Once you practised it this way, do the Kegels while sitting or standing in front of the mirror for a couple of times a day and increase the time to hold it up to 20 seconds.
Try Your Hands on Masturbating!
Masturbation is an art and if you’re not able to stay long in bed, you might be masturbating in a wrong way. What you must be doing while masturbating is holding your weenie, giving it a couple of hard shots and bang!!! Getting your nut off in a minute or two, right? Well, if that’s how you’re masturbating, my friend, I’d have to ask you to change the way you masturbate right away!
From today onwards – or right from this moment – you must take at least 10 minutes to jerk off. I don’t know what you would be doing in those 10 minutes but make a promise to yourself that you won’t cum before 10 minutes. You must train yourself to control your ejaculation after reaching a certain point. To do so, you may either slow the process of beating the bishop, change the stroke or distract yourself in between. Apply any of these techniques or create something of your own to have a control over your ejaculation. Once you’re capable of holding it for 10 minutes, gradually increase the time for up to 20 or minutes.
Strategize Your Foreplay Activities!
Usually, foreplay starts with kissing, smooching and touching for a while and then giving each other the oral pleasure before having the actual sexual intercourse. And, that foreplay order causes you to ejaculate earlier than you should be. Reason being, you indulge yourself in the sexual intercourse right after having an intense oral stimulation. However, making a minor change in the order of foreplay can provide you enough time to cool down. Hence, starting the foreplay with kissing, smooching and touching is all fine, though, what you need to make sure of is the order to oral stimulation. Ask your partner to give you blowies before you digging for clams as it will give you a breather to seal the deal!
Control Your Vinegar Strokes!
You can control your ejaculation while masturbating or during the foreplay but what about the situation when you’re knocking boots? You can’t stop in a midway and relax your muscles while she’s lascivious and wants it all. Instead, you can ask her to switch the positions and try something else. This way, not only you will get some time to cool down but also find less stimulating positions.
Apart from all these, diaphragmatic breathing or deep breathing is another helpful way to send a message to your brain that everything is fine and you’ll take more time to finally bust your load. Otherwise, you do have your Kegels practice on! Squeeze it hard when you feel like you’re about to shoot your load!
Some Slangs I used in this article!
- Make whoopee –have sex
- Blew my load – ejaculated
- Weenie – penis
- Getting your nut off – ejaculating
- Jerk off – ejaculate
- Beating the bishop – having sexual intercourse
- Blowies – blow job (male)
- Digging for clams – blow job (female)
- Seal the deal – have sexual intercourse
- Vinegar Strokes – moment right before ejaculation
- Knocking boots – having sex
- Shoot your load – ejaculate